entry 33

is altruism real?

apparently they discussed that question in year 10 philosophy but i never did it so i guess i don't really know the answer.

smiles are simply beautiful y'know? especially when they're aimed at you! like holy crap, what some people would do to get others to smile. random ass things that's what. i'm currently eating oatmeal and the greek yoghurt ran out :')

so uhhhh

i sometimes feel like if i write stuff down here, it'll jinx me. as in i'll write something awesome that happened and then follow it up with some kind of action that makes awkwardness befall on everything else. you feel? :/

for the sake of not wanting to forget (heck i have to write about the japanese trip still but i do remember lots of things from it... god do i want to go back - but the thing is i want to go back with the class again, just for that same feeling. highschool is coming to an end, it's scary, i don't want it to end at the same time as i am excited for the end... but i just don't want to leave my year haha), here i go hey:

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Me:
after gyoza right people had to clean and i just helped to gather some plates and i'm so glad i did ;;; like it was just me lenalee (*refer to february 2014), jude, let's call her ummmm lola coz she could totes pull off a saucy pin-up girl look and rock it, and snay - who were cleaning stuff up
and so we went to the staff kitchen and washed things there
and like at first jude filled the sink up with water and lola was getting a sponge and stuff but it would've took a bit of time for her to clean everything so i got another sponge and helped her clean and iunno suddenly i was cleaning and using sponges and lola and jude were drying or lola was doing something and lenalee was doing something else
and like ;; meanwhile we were talking and just making jokes like jude was like nah you don't need to rinse stuff and i was like but it's soapy man and lenalee was like yeah people are gonna eat from that
and like why did jude fill up the sink with water coz we didn't need it filled
but like we were just talking and it was nice ;;; and like jude was asking for the knife covers
so i gave them to him and like when i did i'm going to cry like his hand kind of did this thing and i s2g it's probs just me but like slowly grazed my finger i'm gonna cry but his hand was so gentle save me
and like in the moment it wasn't so !!!Ssadjdj/sob
it was more  like  ??
and like after that we finished washing and griffo treated us to more gyoza

Cookie:
Because he washes the dishes white people way
Omg even more haha
YOUR SHOUJO MOMENT
Graze of the hand

Me:
LOL yeah and me and lenalee and lola were joking like maybe it's just us
yeah ;;;;;;;;; and like omg so after we were walking out of the class
i was like to jude nice dancing w/ the harmony thing btw

Cookie:
Im proud of u man

Me:
and he was like hahaha thank you  and i was like ;;
and then in eng ext
like iunno we were given a presentation apparently due next week tuesday and i was like what because y'know bio and music camp
when jude was like hey jesse
and i was like oh yo man and like it was across tables
and like sir bro was talking and he said something

Cookie:
Yo man...

Me:
and i couldn't hear it so i was like could u say that again
i'm paraphrasing ok ;;

Cookie:
Oh thank god

Me:
and he said it again but i couldn't hear it coz at the same time
sir bro was talking

Cookie:
I thought you actually said that
Lol it was probably "you have a lot of grey hairs"

Me:
and like i was like i can't hear you kind of in like a 'laughing coz u keep trying but sir bro keeps talking' kind of way

Cookie:
Lol i can actually imagine this happen

Me:
and he did this cute little smile om i'm /sob like he smiled in the 'i know' kind of way and i was like ;;;
and then finally after sir bro finished he was like
aren't we going to the tanken centre next week?
and i was like ?? the tanken centre? i had no idea about that
and he was like yeah apparently we might be going there next week or maybe the week after i'm not sure

Cookie:
I dont think so...

Me:
and i was like oh okay that's sweet!! and he was like :) and i was like :)
and that was it
but ;;;;;;;;

Cookie:
AWWWW HE WENT OUT OF HIS WAY TO ASK UN THO

Me:
YEAH I WAS JUST HTINKGIN THAT
/SOB
LIKE i had no idea i'm gonna cry he's so cudfhasdjashdfghj
omgmgmgmmg SAVE ME BRI
THE PINKY GRAZE
/DIES

Cookie:
IT'S OKAY JESSE

Me:
THE PINKY GRAZE KILLED ME

Cookie:
U gotta make more moments like this happen k

Me:
OMG I REENACTED IT WITH MY BRO
LIKE I WAS TELLING HIM THE STORY

Cookie:
Just dont force it too much

Me:
AND HE DIDN't GET IT
YES!!!! okay!!!

Cookie:
Omfg u reenacted  it

Me:
i'm not sure what i'd talk to him about... but then again it's just about making friends so like just be normal huh
yeah and then my bro was like ohhhh i get you
and like he told me this story how he did that with this girl he liked once called joanne

Cookie:
Yeah treat him as a normal person
Not someone you like
Otherwise you'll get too caught up

Me:
yeah

Cookie:
Like everyone haha

Me:
your advice is really great bri-chi /sob

Cookie:
Omg joanne haha

Me:
yeah omg and so apparently it was rainy
and guess what there was only one umbrella

Cookie:
shoujo manga has showed me the ways
Frick and they went to a shrine
And he invited her to the summer festival?

Me:
and so joanne was like i'll hold it and my bro was like nah it's okay i'll hold it and like so she didn't stop holding it so he put his hand on hers and she didn't mind and then he didn't know what to do with his other arm so he put his arm around her and was like "alright we gotta battle this rain!!" and apparently it worked
yes you predicted it
you got it so right i'm in awe
bri i'm so happy ;; like we actually talk to each other a bit and it doesn't feel too awkward haha but also i'M SO EXCITED FOR THE APPARENT TANKEN CENTRE THING??? LIKE I'VE BEEN MISSING SO MUCH JAPANESE DUE TO EXCURSIONS BUT NOW  WE MIGHT BE GOING ON A JAP EXCURSION I WAS actually like so happy

Cookie:
Omg this joanne chick so wanted in too haha
Tanken centre much fun such wow
It'll be cool tho cos my friends will actually be here this time haha
what weren't we there with u last time

Me:
OMG IT WOULD BE  SO GOod
IT WILL BE
THE BEST
/sBp
o'm jsut still kinda :')
hsi hand was so gentle wth total shoujo moment i'm crying also i'm just a bit happy?? iunno but that he went out of his way probably not much but y'know to just tell me about the whole tanken centre deal like it's interesting coz it's different from with lachlan? like before then every time i'd talk to him it was just so taboo kinda and like his friends would be so /save me
but this is a good start like i feel like maybe y'know if i take things step by step maybe it'll be ok???

Cookie:
Last time we weren't in the same class so i was with yass, sam and claire but claire bailed out cos she had a jpn stdent
Yeh friends first man
Otherwise you might realise that he's not what you imagined him to be and then it's hard to fall back on friendship
At least that's what happened to me

Me:
yeah
wow shoujo really has done you good
and experience
;;;  my beautiful precious bae

Cookie:
SHOUJO IS THE WORLD

Me:
YOU ARE THE WORLD
/SOB

Cookie:
IT HAS OPENED UP SOMUCH
...

Me:
/SOB
LOVE YOU SO MUCH /SOB
you make me so happy bri-chi /sob for your advice and listening to me and everything ;;;;;;;;;;;

Cookie:
you remind me of makita yuuri from ao haru ride hahaha
no problem, you guys have done the same
so now time for me to return
makita yuuri is that the one with the short hair

Me:
/SOB OMG
you seriously like captured my heart with that smooth baby butt line
marry me

Cookie:
yes she is hahaha
.... smooth baby butt line
PLS NO MORE
I
have been receiving too much cheesy stuff from friends

Me:
:)))))) i love it ur so cute man
smooth baby butt line
YOU ARE a smooth baby butt
BD
ao haru ride is actually so much teenage drama man

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and there you go

honestly after that i was just feeling really happy and i don't know like i was looking at hamilla and smiling because her smile looked so sweet in the moment she was probs telling the bandaid some crappy pun or something but honestly

altruism huh

/smiles

(i couldn't find an emoticon that could express myself so i wrote the above instead)

have a wonderful day!

also i just wanna say i'm so excited because i'm going to zone and i got 100% on my japanese test so i'm really proud!

bye!!